Name

Message

[quote=study3600]SC __ EXT CAREBEAR VILLAGE-DAY^5 The walkway is deserted now. The windows of the little huts glow and flicker from large screen HDTV's and HD Desktop computers and laptops inside the huts. The sounds of the forest fill the soft breezy air. In the distance, the music of a hover ice cream truck, an emissary from Queen Frostine's Ice Cream Empire, can be heard. Several Carebears rush out to catch up to it, five dollar bills in hand and a pocketbook full of quarters for change, with their children, eager for a frosty treat. Some of them have Coupons signed and sealed by the Dairy Queen herself for free to half off all ice cream truck sales. Marcus has wandered away from the Chief's hut and leans over, head down over the rail and barfs his guts out thinking of seeing his sister in the Victoria's Secret Negligee on Patootie and seeing her in her bra, practically topless on the speeder here on Endorphin. Lee finds him puking. LEE: Marcus, what's wrong? You can't be seasick-we're landlocked, and it can't be motion sickness-we're stationary. Was it something you ate? MARCUS: (lying) That roast we ate--I think it was the woman who used to wear that dress you have on. LEE: You're thinking of Ewoks. They're the cannibals that inhabit the Forest Moon of Endor in an alternate, Serious universe where humor is only employed to break up tense moments, or to move the story along somehow, or to give reality flavor. What's really the matter, Marcus. Tell me. MARCUS: Would you mind buttoning up a few more buttons on your dress? I don't want to see......that. LEE: What's wrong with my pretty, sexy womanly cleavage? Does it turn you on? MARCUS: (Exasperatedly) Gah! Do you remember your mother, your real mother? LEE: (Looks at camera) Now remember folks, this scene was filmed almost 30 years before Revenge of the Sith came out in 2005, so this dialogue won't make any sense to those of you who watched Episode III first. (Looks at Marcus) Just images really, feelings. She was kind, sweet, but sad. Why do you ask? MARCUS: I have no memory of my mother. Darth Vacuous is my near uncle, the husband of my mother, but my father was Been-There McNobi. I sensed him up there on that Star Whacker. I must face him. Alone. LEE: Marcus, no, if Vacuous is your near relation then leave this place. Run, run, far away, where he'll never find you. And take me with you. We can be lovers. Hands is a real do*****g, I'm sick of that nearsighted twerp. I want you. Oh, kiss me you fool! (She wildly embraces him and wraps her spindly legs around her brother's waist, kissing him all over his boyish face. MARCUS: Stop! Stop! Stop already! You're my f****** sister, ok?! Get the hell off of me!!! (She does) Vacuous, Ob-Ewan impregnated Patme Ahmedalla and she had ou and mua and died in childbirth, ok. I know George Lucas won't figure that out that we're siblings til around 1983 or so, but it's true! LEE: You mean I-we--? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! In a huff, Marcus turns on his heel and marches off screen. Hands off comes out, eating a chocolate eclaire Good Humor bar. HANDS: What are you 'eeeeeewing' about, sweetie? LEE: (Turning away from him, sobbing) I- HANDS: Look, if it'll cheer you up I bought you your favorite, a Toll House Chip Burger! It's in Telemarchus' freezer and it's waiting for you to sink your gorgeous white teeth into. LEE: Thanks, but I've suddenly lost my appetite. (The color drains from her face and her cheeks flush green) Lee leans over the rail, her face over the edge, and barfs her guts out. HANDS: Huh. I didn't know the thought of ice-cream on a hot summer's day would make you puke. Anyway, I'm done with my ice cream bar. Back to Yubnub! More Yubnub! Yub Nub! Yub Nub! Bring on the Yubnub! YiYiYiYi YUBNUB! (Tosses ice-cream stick in trash receptacle and throws arms in air and runs inside, squealing like a schoolboy going to recess.)[/quote]